rhe awakening and new beginings, By mlkpascoe
by Mlk Pascoe
Summary: In this story Tara wasn’t just shot dead By Warren, it was Willow who was shot and killed, the Scoobies had a choice to make could they save willow if Tara dies? They made a choice The master could have Tara’s soul in return for Willow’s life .


**Disclaimer… Okay I don't own any of these characters **

Not one…. Not two… not any at all!!!

they all belong to

some Hollywood jet set famous person…. Who I believe is called Joss Wheedon blahh blahh

Who wrote some big TV show called Buffy the vampire slayer!.. satisfied! Now can I get on and pretend that Willow and Tara are part of my crazy world and universe? Thanks xxx Hope you all like ,xxx

**In this story Tara wasn't just shot dead By Warren, it was Willow who was shot and killed, the Scoobies had a choice to make could they save willow if Tara dies? They made a choice The master could have Tara's soul in return for Willow's life only Willow was never to find out Buffy and Xander's choice…. After all they couldn't fight and save the world from the master without Willow and Buffy, Tara didn't have much choice but for her love for Willow she gave up her life… **

**This story starts the few hours before Tara's death… **

**At Buffy Summers house… **

**Willow would only ever think and know that it was Warren who shot Tara… Untill Dawn lets slip to Willow about a letter Tara gave to Faith so that one day Willow could find out the truth and maybe restore Tara's soul;….or will willow get caught up on Dark magic when she tries to get Tara back..**

The Awakening

And new

--BEGININGS---

By MLKPASCOE .

Tara Maclay Lay ,sitting on her and Willows bed, tears are streaming down her face,She felt like her heart had been torn out of her, she felt lost and alone,Willow had been dead for more than a few hours and downstairs she could hear Buffy and Xander , talking about her, Tara,and about Willow.

Xander sounded so angry and hurt.. Buffy So calm and torn, and Dawnie a wreck…

Anya… she couldn't feel Anya's emotions… maybe she had none…just like an ex vengeance demon ,who turns human and doesn't understand the cost of a life.

Tara's Telepathic powers meant she could hear every word said even when she didn't want to … They were talking about her life… Spike had let Slip about a soul demon, who swaps the dead for the life's of the living…. She knew already the choice they were making…

Who should go who should die.. Brave Xander had spoken first only to be shouted at by Anya.. all the Scooby's shared the same thoughts…but none had the guts to say it out loud except for the Slayer , Buffy.

Who they knew the least, who was less popular….. who they wouldn't miss as much.. who they could live with out the same name kept coming up over and over…"Tara… Tara…. Tara…." With only Dawnie crying, her sobs getting louder every time Tara's name was mentioned , It was Dawn who said to the Scooby's to say it was wrong and that willow had passed away , and how Willow would hate them all if they took Tara she even called them Murders and ran up to her room,…

Tara looked up as she saw Dawn running into her bedroom and slamming her door shut…Tara was more than a mom to Dawn than Buffy was, Buffy even struggled as a big sister.

Tara walked over to Willows desk and picked up Willow's favourite Disney Ariel pen and picked up some paper, she was going to write Willow a letter for one day she knew Willow would return and some how find out what really happened.. and Tara knew she wouldn't be here for that day.

She had lost Willow already she had said her final goodbye when she kissed willow and stroked her hair holding, Willows dying body in her arms..

Cradling Willow's head against her breasts, Her lover, her soul mate dead…Willows blood from Warrens gun shot still soaked into her shirt… So even if she did give up her life for Willow she would still never see her beloved Willow again…

Or would she? with Willows own powerful magic maybe willow could summon her back from the dead, once she knew what the Scooby's had done to her Tara…

"its my only chance of ever seeing Willow again I h..have to tell her …." Tara held the pen in her hand and began to right with her own tears blotting the paper now and then…

"My darling Willow,

Soon you will have learnt I have died of a gunshot wound you will have false memory' of this day, you will really have my memory of this day, my feelings and emotions as it was really you who died in my arms,

This is my only chance to tell you how much I love you and how I was so glad when we got back together…. It made my day and I knew I would love you for the rest of my life..

I haven't got long as I write this letter the Scooby's are downstairs discussing my future which I will give up for you, I love you willow and I know if you ever get this letter from Faith then you will figure a way to get me back, but to get Faith to give you this letter you Must have first found out the terrible truth of my death.

Don't be mad with Buffy and Xander and Anya, they were right in what they did, Just like you were when you brought Buffy back,

I know that you were right now, I guess Miss "psycho pep squad" Knew what I was talking about after all huh?

It's just so unfair that they are about to get you back once again and I'm about to loose you maybe forever if you don't read this letter…."

As Tara continued to write her feelings down, she was fully aware of the conversation going on down stairs , she tuned in and allowed her self to listen, to eves drop, It was Giles Voice she could here….

"I m not so sure I agree with any of you, Bringing anyone back from the dead could have serious consequences and what are you all planning on telling Willow when she asks where Tara is?" Argued Giles, The watcher .. the listener…. Willows Guide and Buffy's Teacher.

"you are not God Buffy This is not your decision to make" Shouted Giles who couldn't hide his disappointment of his slayer the first time she had ever let him down.

"that's just it Giles we don't tell her " Buffy answered coldly

even though she hadnt been herself since coming back, she was even more determined to bring back willow, Willow never gave up on her she broughther back... and now it was Buffys turn to do the same.

"does anyone else not ever want to see Willow again? She shouldn't have died, and tonight we all know that and there's a way to bring her back, that's not wrong, Giles, Buffy is living proof of that," Xander sided with Buffy as usual, that left Anya…and Faith.

"can you all lie to Willow? I now I can lie well, but you lot? Because if she ever found out what you were planning she'd hate you" shrugged Anya who could simplify any situation

"B, Tara's a good witch and she's Willow's squeeze are you sure this is what's right? Are you sure it s the only way?" Most people had forgotten Faith was there except Tara.

Faith had been there for her when she was holding Willow,

She was now her last chance.

"Faith, we have to get Willow back you all know how powerful she is, Sunny Dale needs her I need her, Tara will understand and she will give up her life for Willow" Buffy answered sure of herself..

"so that makes it okay then?" Giles answered.

"Yes it does…. Ill do it tell me what to do and I'll do it" Tara cut in, she was standing on the stair case as she had slipped into the room unnoticed.. she hid the letter behind her back… and looked at Faith she would use her telepathic powers to talk to faith about her letter… No one else would ever no or hear…

"Tara!!!" The Scooby's replied, they all had guilty looks on their faces as they realised she knew what they were planning all of them except Buffy who looked at her with respect a slayers number one rule…

do what has to be done .,….

"tell me what to do, I'll do it tonight, Faith will take me."

"it's a Soul swap demon" Said Buffy

"so I die and Willow lives?" answered Tara her head held high

"yes basically" Buffy answered almost choking for the first time.

"okay let's get on with it, by tomorrow Willow will be back, "

Tara wouldn't let the Scooby's see her fear of what would happen to her soul… where she would go.. what demon would want her soul….. she brushed all the fear aside, and hoped that the sacrifice she made would be enough to cheat the master and take her into another dimension, another heaven…

"you all love willow as much as I do make sure you look after her" That was all Tara would say on the matter… she looked over to Faith who she had become good friends with and pleaded with her, she spoke in her mind and knew Faith would hear her, She Blocked out Buffy from intercepting her thoughts…

"Faith.. I need your help, don't say anything to the others, I have a letter you must give to Willow when its right between her and the Scooby's, Please don't tell Buffy she may take it away"

"okay , Tara, this is weird I can hear you in my head ,I can talk to you without my lips moving!!" Faith answered

"I know its your knew power,im giving you when i die, Look after Willow, Love her, she'll need you when you tell her what they did to me.. and when you tell her I love her and will never stop loving her"

"why are you doing this Tara?" asked Faith ,this time out loud..

"none else will, and id be honoured to die for Willow!"

With one more glance from Tara to Faith, Faith walked over to Tara and gave her a hug as she did so, Tara slipped her Willow's letter,

"come on , Spike and I will take you are you ready?"Faith exclaimed, Knowing It was to much for B to take Tara, B was to close to willow.

"yes I'm ready" sighed Tara,quietly.

Tara didn't say goodbye to Dawn it was just to painful, she couldn't bring her self to look at Anya and Xander or Buffy But Giles followed the witch and the second slayer out of Buffys living room, and outside, he knew how tough this was for Tara, eh would give up his life for Buffy's Indoors the Scooby's fell silent, looking at each other with guilty looks,

Had they done the right thing? Buffy thought shed done the right thing for everyone for Willow when the truth was she had done the right thing for herself.

The lump in her throat had stopped her from speaking.. from talking

She had killed innocent ,it was her words that had put Tara to her death….. And she knew Willow would hate her for it.

A week later and Willow is back from the dead and is still coming to terms with losing Tara ,The Scooby's Lies are gradually unfolding around them...

"So will how are ya keeping up?" Asked Xander he was worried willow still was lounging about the house with Tara on her mind all day long.. With Willow being so smart he was scared she was starting to work out the Scooby's real part in all of this their Betrayal, after all its not like Spike would say anything? …would he? Xander's eye brows raised with his worrying look…But it was mainly a look of guilt.

"Xander that's the fourth time you asked me that question ,I feel terrible now like a part of me has been ripped out but ill be okay"" As Willow said this The Toaster blew up…. Willow barley notices..

"dam I liked that toaster.. I liked it and now it's broken.. I didn't mean to…"

"Will its okay it was a bad toaster right Buff?"Xander said in his happy go lucky voice,

"right Will way bad…"Buffy couldn't bring her self to look at Willow in the eye, she saw Tara in Willow every time she tried… She had made the right choice hadn't she? They all had… after all Tara was dead now and willow was here so there was nothing they could do…

Buffy glanced across the room his eyes wouldn't meet hers.. He had changed his mind. After they had made the decision and taken Tara to see Solomon The soul daemon… he went up to willow and put his hand on her shoulder shaking his head at Buffy…

There was no going back now , they would loose Willow, and that couldn't happen..

Dawn came into the kitchen and sat next to Willow she squeezed Willows hand." I miss her too" She was the first one of the Scooby's to say that and willow managed a small smile… for the first time..,.

"I just don't understand why I don't remember everything?

Where we were? what were we doing? Then I wake up holding Tara and she's dying my arms.. why cant I remember anything ,its almost too much, what were our last words?"

"the reason you don't remember "Dawn started she gulped and wanted to tell Willow everything, she ignored Buffy's glares.. it was too much, a week of Willow grieving and why? Just so the Scooby's could feel better instead of just telling her

"Dawn shut it now and go to school" Buffy screamed worried that Dawn was going to tell everything..

"no Buffy its not Right… Willow has a right to know what really happened why Tara died"

"what's this Danwie? Do you know something I don't?"

asked Willow softly.

"Buffy does don't you _Buffy?_ tell her tell Willow what you did!!" Dawn screamed back, surprised at her own out burst.

"Dawn that's enough I' sorry will I .. I cant tell you, I have to go" Before willow could answer Buffy spun around pushing past dawn angrily But dawn stood her ground she wasn't going any where, with that Buffy ran out of the house slamming the door.. She couldn't tell willow she couldn't… that would be it willow would hate her.. She was going to see Solomon to get a memory wiping potion so that none of them would ever remember Tara Maclay even existed that's what Buffy should have one in the first place, She started running she just wanted to get there in time before Dawn told Willow everything.

Can be continued if you all like it….


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